You Stole My Loneliness With A False Company

“You robbed me of my loneliness with a false company.” You may feel this feeling, this emptiness. You have experienced it on some occasion in your past with that interested friendship that was looking for its own benefit, and that, possibly, never cared too much about your interests, your sorrows or joys.

And what about those affective relationships that faded into the abyss of failure ? Usually occurs. We open the doors of our hearts to people who excite us, who excite us … Then, we realize that there is no loneliness more painful than having someone who does not see us by our side. That he does not know how to make us happy.

Emotional loneliness is one of the great “evils” of our present time. Many of us are surrounded by people, family, friends, our partner, and hundreds and even thousands of friends in our social networks … And yet, there is no pain more agonizing than perceiving those gaps, those gaps that no one knows fill in.

The loneliness that nobody sees

Emotional loneliness has a rather contradictory edge. It is very possible that they often tell you that of “You cannot complain, what a couple you have so attentive and who loves you so much”, “You sure will never get bored, with the many friends you have”. You will say yes with your head and you will draw a warm smile on your face knowing that appearances are only appearances, and that in reality, you feel immensely alone.

Often, we conceive loneliness as the physical absence of people around us, where we move through life without ties to bind us, without people to care for us or whom to reflect on to offer and give that daily affection that enriches us all. Now, is it necessary to always have someone by our side to be happy? Absolutely.

Thus, we could almost say that all those people who enter our life and offer us only their selfishness or their emotional immaturity, also take away from us that precious loneliness or balance in which we find a precious protection.

How to overcome emotional loneliness?

As we have pointed out at the beginning, emotional loneliness is one of the most devastating feelings that human beings can feel. The feeling of having someone and even many people around us and yet being aware that we feel terribly alone can be the prelude to depression.

1- Identify that discomfort, that dissatisfaction, that emptiness. Sometimes we can mask emotional loneliness with other dimensions, such as low self-esteem, low motivation for our social relationships, when in reality, what we feel is that “there is something that is beyond us and that is missing” . And the wound is in that person or those people who are around us, and who do not see us, who do not enrich us, who do not know in essence, make us happy …

2-Reflect and attend to your emotions. What are you feeling? Is it sadness, who makes you feel this way? Do you feel frustrated, what produces this feeling? Are you afraid, who or what causes it?

3- Once you have identified the real problem, communicate it. It is vital that you share with others how you feel, be it your partner, a family member or a friend. Make it very clear that this relationship causes you more suffering than happiness, and that it is necessary to take new strategies.

4- Once you have started the engine of change, whatever it may be, it is vital that you go back to enjoying your own solitude. The reason? You have spent a long time without being yourself, waiting for things, craving certain sensations, emotions … In your being there are a series of needs that you must balance by finding that inner child again, that adult who demands inner peace at the same time.