The Importance Of Having A Good Relationship With Oneself

Since we are small we need the affection and the company of others to feel integrated in a group and maintain our psychological well-being. Despite this, we live in an individualistic society, in which competition and the material are more important than our own needs.

Of all the relationships that we find throughout our life; Friends, family, co-workers, partner, and society itself are all affected by a common denominator. Us. Thus, just as it is important to know how to relate to others, it is also important to have a good relationship with yourself.

It’s you first

We are born without an instruction manual on how to live. However, the fact that for this it is important to have a good relationship with oneself, in addition to being aware of all that it implies, could be compared to the safety instructions of airplanes: “ put on your oxygen mask before putting it on. another person ” .

Think for a moment about the people you love and care about and reflect on how you act with them. Surely, sometimes, you carry out behaviors to make them feel comfortable or because you know they care. Hence, it is very common to leave us for the end and not do those things for us.

However, while it is ignored and undervalued, there is always time to look into the eyes of our own being and connect with who we are, free from distractions.

Of course, we cannot forget that we live in a liquid society, as Bauman said, one in which the superficial and the ephemeral shape our lifestyle. The one in which social and digital interaction makes the act of disconnecting difficult for fear of getting lost and discovering everything that we are in essence.

A society that demands an egocentric self that diminishes the ability to truly relate and in which the relationship with oneself is totally distorted.

Now, disconnecting from the digital, from the world of appearance and the superficial is necessary and almost urgently. You have to have your own space to clarify and simplify our world, although it is true that this takes time. For this reason, from time to time, we must stop along the way to think and check how we are, especially when our circumstances and needs change.

For example, when you are under too much stress you need to know how to relax and take a breath. For this, it is advisable to have the following phrase engraved in our mind: “Today I am not for anyone because today I need myself”.

Take care of your internal dialogue

One of the most important aspects that we have to take care of in order to have a good relationship with ourselves is the way we speak to each other, that is, our internal dialogue. The one that is influenced by what other people told us when we were little and that as we grow up shapes the relationship we have with us.

Balance the scales

If when we were children we were encouraged to satisfy our personal needs and interests, without forgetting those of others, we will surely develop a healthy foundation for our own relationship. The one in which we are also important, we respect each other and we take each other into account.

However, this is rarely the norm. There are many people who have not wondered how they are, how they are and where they are going, although it is never too late. Or there are also those others who only have reproaches and negative comments towards themselves. The important thing is to stop whipping yourself, accept yourself and give yourself a healthy self-love. Cognitive behavioral therapy, meditation, and daily reflection can go a long way in this.

How to develop a stronger relationship with yourself?

A healthy and balanced relationship with yourself is the ability to value yourself healthily as a person and accept both strengths and weaknesses. The process to achieve this may be different for each person, but there are some common points to keep in mind. They are as follows:

• Self-confidence. Trust is very important. You have to be able to stand behind yourself and believe in yourself, even if you end up making a mistake or wrong decision. Confidence is nurtured by knowing that you can learn from it, correct it, and keep moving forward. It also means trusting your intuition and knowing that you have the answers within you.

• Love yourself. What does it mean to really love yourself? It is about knowing your defects and virtues, knowing who you are as a person (your values ​​and fundamental principles) and believing that you are capable because you are a being with the ability to love, create, feel, believe.
• Spending quality time with yourself. Knowing how you like to be treated by others is a great guide. The time you take for self-reflection, to be with you alone, is key to starting to change habits and behaviors that do not make you evolve as a person. To do this, reserve a few minutes a day to have an appointment with you.
• Prioritize self-care : adequate sleep, exercise, diet, hobbies, relaxation and rest.
• Be tested. Dare to grow, do and be better. Take a risk, be brave and take a step to do what you want so much and that fear limits.

• Click the restart or shutdown button. Disconnecting from social networks and turning off the mental noise of our day to day have many psychological benefits. Meditation or a walk in nature are other alternatives.
• Have fun in the process. Self-discovery is a daily process that lasts a lifetime. Enjoying this process of introspection will help you keep growing. Of course, from the respect and being aware that not everything will be a bed of roses …

Having a good relationship with yourself is a journey that lasts a lifetime. If you feel unconditional love for your family or loved ones, you also have to experience it for yourself. Do you dare to look within to discover yourself and determine who you are?