The Extreme Of Perfectionism: Obsessive Disorder
Perfectionism is a concept that we use a lot in psychology. It is the conviction that many people have that it is possible, and also must, achieve perfection. That is, the extreme of good work, without mistakes and without mistakes. So that the result obtained pleases everyone.
But is this possible? Obviously the answer is no. Perfectionism is an unrealistic attitude and can lead to the most deadly suffering. Although … on the other hand, it is still true that the perfectionist attitude has a positive side : the artists who continue their work until they get the canvas they imagined in their head or the surgeon who does not close the intervention until they are one hundred percent convinced that you have completely finished removing the tumor.
This attitude is beneficial, but it must be clear that these people, despite being perfectionists with themselves, do not believe in absolute perfectionism. They take risks and strive, wanting to do their best, but knowing that they are going to have to allow themselves the mistake that all their actions and results are going to have.
These people fall into the obsession to avoid the negative, the error, what they do not tolerate happening and this ends up paralyzing them to the point of limiting almost their entire life. We are talking, in this sense, of one of the most common outputs of this type of perfectionism, obsessive compulsive disorder.
Obsessive compulsive disorder and DSM-V
The latest update of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, the DSM-V defines OCD as follows.
It is a general pattern of concern for orderliness, perfectionism, and mental and interpersonal control. It manifests itself at the expense of flexibility, spontaneity, and efficiency. It begins early in life flattering and occurs in a variety of contexts, as indicated by four (or more) of the following items:
- Preoccupation with details, rules, lists, order, organization or schedules. To the point of losing sight of the main objective of the activity.
- Perfectionism that interferes with the completion of tasks (eg, inability to finish a project because it does not meet your own demands).
- Excessive dedication to work and productivity to the exclusion of leisure activities and friendships.
- Excessive stubbornness, scrupulousness and inflexibility on issues of morals, ethics or values.
- Inability to throw away worn or useless objects, even when they have no sentimental value.
- He is reluctant to delegate tasks or tasks to others, unless they are subject to exactly his way of doing things.
- Greedy style in spending for himself and others. Money often accumulates because of thoughts about future catastrophes.
- Signs of stiffness and stubbornness.
Obsessive disorder and perfectionism
The association is clear: obsessive people are characterized by having had a demanding education when it comes to achievement. It is true that the culture in which we live already incites us and presses us to always be better than we are. In addition, it is very hard on the redemption sentences that it imposes on failure. The fear of the unknown, of making mistakes, of making an unfortunate decision, etc., is transferred to us from children.
The thoughts revolve around fear, the possibility of something happening that they “cannot” tolerate : hurting others or themselves, becoming ill or contaminated, ending up in the deepest destitution … They are tremendously negative cognitions and with a level of amazing fiction.
They have no evidence that what they fear is actually going to happen, but they still think that it is highly likely to happen. This fear causes them to design strategies that relax them in the short term. These strategies are called compulsions. Through compulsions, what is tried is to avoid that possible invented catastrophe and to achieve calm.
Abandon perfection and cure obsession
To date, the psychological treatment that has received the greatest empirical endorsement has been “Exposure with response prevention ”. It consists of blocking or delaying the compulsion, while in parallel other types of strategies are developed to tolerate and reduce the anxiety that this generates. It is done gradually, so that the adaptation process itself helps.
Physiologically, anxiety will descend through a process of habituation and, furthermore, obsession will lose credibility when observing that what we fear so much does not finally happen. It is simply a film that we have originated in our head and films, as such, are fiction and not reality.
There is another way to get rid of obsessions related to perfection and that is to force ourselves to try to achieve it. That is, in order not to become obsessed with perfection, we must not wish to find it and even reject it. In this way, we will be ready for everything that has to happen.
I can start working in a job that is not the one of my dreams, but that is more or less good for me and is well paid. In this way I will be turning my back to perfection and tolerating that many times I have to take the best option that I can afford and not the absolute best option. Later and little by little, I can look for something better, but always from desire and not from fear. This cuts the compulsion: if I have nothing to lose and I devalue it perfectly, what is the point of compulsion?
Therefore, to get rid of the dreaded obsessions, I am going to expose myself to what I fear, in a calm way and without obsessing to heal quickly. On the other hand, I will not want to be perfect, but a normal and ordinary human being who fails, who makes mistakes, who is not always in a good mood and for whom everything will not always turn out well. I will also tolerate that the people around me are not perfect and I will not pretend that they are.
In this way, my level of affection and fear in the face of the possible ups and downs of life will decrease. Think that no matter how harsh the whims of fate may be, the harsher and more corrosive those voices that continually force me to seek perfection can become.
