How To Communicate With People Who Think Differently

Many of us are forced to communicate with people who think differently. Knowing how to do it effectively will prevent us from drifting into those verbal battlefields where we sometimes lose our cool and emotions tend to run low. However, let’s be clear: you can live together and even reach agreements with someone who thinks differently.

Napoleon used to say that one should not be afraid of those who think differently; who should be feared are those who are silent and avoid saying what they think. Let’s admit it, the latter is precisely what some of us do sometimes, when we are with one or more people who speak and comment on things with which we do not agree.

We tell ourselves that it is not worth wasting time and effort. We convince ourselves that it is better to stand aside, nod our heads and let them talk so that we can conserve our own energy and not fall into useless arguments. Now, doing this continuously would mean, for example, giving strength to the single thought.

It is necessary to understand that our world is filled with perspectives, ways of feeling, of giving opinions, of thinking and of appreciating each reality that surrounds us. The wealth of opinions is what makes us free, knowing how to respect ourselves makes us great. Therefore, letting our voice be heard reinforces us as people, and also our identity.

Dialogue is, after all, a wonderful exercise in civility, where we confront ideas, relativize approaches and sometimes even reach consensus. Thus, in an increasingly complex and dynamic social scenario, knowing how to communicate with those who think differently is a valuable psychological tool.

Keys to communicate with people who think differently

Communicating with people who think differently is something that must be learned. It is a core matter of life that requires voluntariness and commitment, because it is not something exactly easy.

Already as children we realize that, sometimes, having a different opinion generates disputes, problems and even being pointed with the finger. As we get older, we discover other things in turn.

One of them is to verify that some people, by having different opinions on certain issues, feel not only different from us, but above us. It is as if an alternative gaze gives them moral authority.

In these circumstances, it is very difficult to communicate and reach agreements. What can we do in those moments? What strategies could we use if we are forced to live with someone who thinks differently?

These keys can help us.

Prepare to step out of your comfort zone

The first step is to mentalize ourselves. A defining trait of the human being is his tendency to group with like-minded individuals, with people who share similar hobbies and thoughts with oneself.

Thus, we cannot deny that if there is something that is difficult for us, it is to leave precisely that comfort zone and make contact with someone who thinks differently.

Now, the simple fact of letting go of that apparent comfort to dare to confront, to dialogue, to make our positions clear is a necessary and healthy exercise. Ideas should be aired, transmitted, and put on the table to make clear positions and, if possible, even to create bridges.

Think like a behavior profiler

When we are going to make contact with someone who thinks differently from us, it is best not to leave anything to chance. Hence, the ideal is to go prepared and know in advance what that person is like, to know what to expect and how to act. If this is not possible, we will obtain information as we go along by attending to non-verbal language.

One way to buy time to study the other person is to start the dialogue by letting the other person gain ground . We can repeat your same phrases or limit ourselves to asking questions while we collect information from the other. In this way, we will see if he is a reasonable person or if he leads to authoritarian behavior or inflexible thinking.

Take for granted that they will not agree with you in many respects

To communicate with people who think differently, we must assume two things:

• The first is that they may well disagree with many of our ideas.
• The second is that we should not lose our cool about it. We must carry out adequate emotional management so as not to lose our roles when they contradict us, when reproaches or even criticisms arrive.

Every opposing opinion we hear should be greeted with calm and respect. The calm mind always responds more effectively to these circumstances, and this is undoubtedly a dimension that we must work on and train.

Expose yes, impose never

You have the right to make your position clear. You can and should talk about your ideas, inform the other of what you believe, what you think and what you feel.

Now, something that we should never do is impose on who we have in front what we defend. Because opinions are not imposed, they are exposed and defended if necessary, but we will never resort to the threat so that others assume our vision of the world.

If the other tries, we will be facing a type of violent communication; something we cannot tolerate.

To conclude, communicating with people who think differently involves understanding that, sometimes, we will not cross the same bridges together. However, this does not mean that we cannot live together, that respect and harmony cannot exist and that, at a given moment, far from there being insurmountable differences, there is even the possibility that we may agree on some aspect.

The most important thing to remember is that dialogue is a necessary exercise. Let’s avoid staying in the corner of silence, all voices deserve to be heard; Only in this way do we defend our identities, position ourselves in the world and gain self-esteem. If we do it with respect and empathy, we will win in coexistence.