Summer Loves: Ephemeral Passions With An Expiration Date?

Who else and who least has had any experience with summer love affairs. They are those stories that we live with intensity, but knowing, often, that they had an expiration date. His images and the memory of those sensations are almost always associated with the lyrics of a song, the smell of saltpeter or the taste of kisses given on nights of complicity that culminated in placid sunrises.

These summer passions usually have their first appearance in our adolescence, at which time these experiences arrive in a revealing way to mark themselves on fire in our emotional memory. Its endings, like the summer storms themselves, can be a cataclysm of conflicting emotions; but everything lived will be worth it. Because many had with those fleeting loves good opportunities for vital learning, the kind that is not always learned in books.

Summer adventures, in fact, can come at any time without even caring that we already comb gray hair. In fact, according to experts, these passions arise for very specific reasons. One of them is undoubtedly fascinating: in summer, there is a greater disposition towards love. We may not realize it, but when our brain feels free from the chains of routine, stress and obligations, it is more receptive and open to new experiences …

Summer loves: summer relaxation and a brain in search of emotions

Longer days, a climate that invites activity, to get out of the house and socialize, lower stress level, desire to do new things … There is something magical in summer, something that goes beyond even the holidays themselves, those that who more and who less, can afford.

At this time, as Tennessee Williams well reflected in his works, everything is more intense, our emotions are on the surface and our hearts are more willing to connect with others. There are multiple factors that explain this effervescence of summer love affairs.

Time stands still, we’re more focused on the here and now

When summer comes, our minds only want two things. The first is to disconnect from worries. The second is not to think about yesterday or focus on what will come from September or October. Almost without realizing it, we put into practice a principle of extraordinary personal well-being: focus on the present.

That approach is the one that allows us to capture and process things in a very different way than we normally do. We are more open to the experience, we enjoy the little things and even the food tastes better to us… This makes, for example, memory make such significant anchors: the smell of sunscreen cream reminds us of the beach on the that we were, the smell of popcorn from that fair with that first kiss with our summer partner …

Everything is more intense in this period of the year and our brain is more willing to experience crushes.

A brain with a different neurochemistry

In summer almost everything changes; we too. We enjoy a more relaxed state of mind while being interested in the stimuli that surround us, our body delights in the sunlight, we have a more open attitude and willing to socialize … All of this can make it easier for us to feel more in love, but we can’t forget a fascinating fact either.

A relaxed brain is a happy brain. This means, for example, that we release more endorphins, serotonin and dopamine. All this neurochemistry also invites us to connect, for relationships to flow more spontaneously in those summer contexts that are themselves oriented towards relaxation.

Summer loves are like champagne bubbles . They are intense, they revolutionize us, they make us feel good and in this, a brain willing to constantly release oxytocin and norepinephrine contributes without a doubt.

Is it true that all summer love has an expiration date?

There are summers that are lived as if we were suspended in a separate dimension. There is no past or future, only a present full of effusiveness, magic, intense sensations … There are no worries, only the pleasure of experiencing the here and now fully with someone. That balance of absolute perfection goes into crisis when the summer or the holidays are over.

That spell is broken with the return to obligations, to real life. It is having to return, in many cases, to our place of residence and terminate a relationship that, somehow, already had an expiration date as soon as it began. However, is this the case in all cases? Are all summer loves fleeting?

Healthy summer loves, summer loves that hurt

Not all summer loves expire. There are those who make that summer meeting the spark of something that can mature and become a stable and happy bond.

Now, on average, those romances that the heat brings go with the first storms of autumn. And sure enough, some hurt. There are loves whose ending requires a complex duel, something that is experienced from adolescents to more than one adult.

For this reason, it is necessary that we have clear some guidelines to better manage those idylls that begin in the summer season.

• Let’s be clear from the beginning what we want and what our situation is. Am I looking for a serious relationship or maybe at this moment it would be better for me to have a romance without obligations or commitments? If I already have a partner, am I willing to carry out an infidelity and handle its consequences? These are points that we should clarify first.
• A summer adventure can be healthy if we have no expectations of anything and we limit ourselves only to living in the moment. There are cases in which many people feel lucky to have had these summer experiences, even knowing that they would be of limited duration.
• Now, when yearning for a long-term relationship, we should be more cautious and avoid getting emotionally involved with someone who has no idea or purpose in making that relationship flourish beyond the summer.

To conclude, there are many summer loves that have had their happy ending, there is no doubt. There are those that start spontaneously and relaxed until they form a wonderful personal adventure that can last decades. However, there are times when what is experienced during a summer is worth a lifetime. Therefore, let us not deny ourselves the opportunity; Even if it is brief, loving is something that will always be worthwhile.