3 Traits Of Emotionally Intelligent People

We now know that people can be emotionally intelligent. There are many types of intelligence: linguistic, musical, logical-mathematical, spatial, bodily, etc. Even so, we tend to believe that only the one that revolves around the “IQ” counts, which only measures the ability to learn in specific areas. Fortunately, this is being reconsidered and today, other types of intelligence, such as emotional, are gaining ground.

Emotional intelligence is defined as the ability to manage and process our emotions with an adaptive purpose. That is to say that the fundamental thing in this type of intelligence consists of knowing how to manage, identify or transmit emotions in such a way that challenges, such as making decisions or managing ourselves at a social level, are simpler.

Emotional intelligence is not determined by our genetics. On the contrary, it is sensitive to  experience and is susceptible to modifications over time. This means that we can learn to be more emotionally intelligent as a great way to improve our lives. Although the characteristics of emotional intelligence are many, here we will focus on three that we consider the most relevant.

Emotional intelligence is associated with self-knowledge

Self-knowledge is the identification of desires, aversions and what makes up our subjective world. It is one of the characteristics of emotionally intelligent and mentally healthy people. This is so because this inner knowledge gives them a great advantage when, for example, predicting their own behavior in certain situations.

This characteristic implies a deep process of reflection about our potentialities and our limitations. It usually involves different ingredients, such as introspection, self-observation, self-esteem, autobiographical memory, self-perception, self-acceptance, and exploration. This ability gives us the necessary knowledge to differentiate ourselves from other individuals and from the environment.

A person acts emotionally intelligently when he is able to recognize his strengths and weaknesses. This condition allows you to behave in an assertive way in different situations. Additionally we can say that it is an attribute that is perfected over time.

Recent studies show that it is not true that all mental capacities evolve the same over the years. What is true is that there is a decrease in the speed of information processing. But, in compensation, other functions are enhanced and evolve over the years. This is the case with emotional intelligence: it slows down over time, but at the same time it gets deeper and sharper.

Openness to change, another relevant feature

Emotional intelligence stimulates the ability to face with an open mind everything that means an improvement  for our life, in the direction we want. Everything is in a permanent transformation. Life is like a catalog of opportunities.

That is why it is important to identify our needs, assume them and enrich ourselves with the experience. An emotionally intelligent person knows that change for the sake of change makes little sense. Instead, when there are compelling reasons to change, it does so, because this makes the difference between being the same and being better.

Emotionally intelligent people are not afraid of change. They are clear about the importance of being flexible in the face of the diversity of situations that arise on a day-to-day basis and to which they must adapt. They assimilate changes and see them as an opportunity to achieve goals and be happier.

A high level of emotional intelligence in this aspect allows us to perform better in the work, personal and social fields. It makes us stronger in the face of negative criticism and also better able to tolerate high doses of stress effectively. When we manage to master this aspect, we evolve significantly.

Emotionally broad vocabulary

The advantage of this faculty is that those who develop it have the ability to clearly and precisely define their emotions. This prevents us from immersing ourselves in states of confusion and stagnation that would nullify our criteria and would hinder our way of functioning. Many conflicts arise due to lack of precision when defining our feelings, something that leads to misunderstandings.

Many people define their emotional state as “I feel bad”, which is very ambiguous. What kind of malaise is that? Those who apply emotional intelligence specify the reason for their discomfort, even with countless synonyms: I feel upset, anxious, frustrated, irritated, tired, etc.

Emotionally intelligent people do not hide their emotions, they recognize their own and have the ability to understand those of others. They differentiate the meaning of each emotion and the context in which it occurs. They are able to control the magnitude of their emotions and express them correctly: they are not slaves of their emotions. On the contrary, they use the energy in them to their advantage.

Images courtesy of Vladimir Kush